I have this photo of Mum and Amy as my screensaver.
I look at this photo every day but I cant bring myself to really have a proper look. If I look properly at this photo and look into my Mother’s eyes I feel myself begin to get all teary. So I quickly look away or I focus on my grand daughter’s face instead.
The enormity of the hole that Mum has left in our lives is only just now starting to become apparent.
Thankfully I have stopped crying every time I think of Mum,though I am crying a little bit as I write this because trying to articulate the depth of my loss makes me examine it in more detail than I want to.
Veronica now has two horses and she reminds me so much of Mum, in that she never does things by halves. Mum was an accomplished and knowledgeable horsewoman and watching my daughter with her two horses I am confident that it wont be long before Veronica is the same.
I don’t know where I am going with this post at all. I only know that today the sky is blue and it promises to be a lovely day and for that I am thankful.
David has been formally diagnosed by the geneticist as having Classical EDS with a score of 7 on the Beighton scale. ( a non bendy person might score a 1 if they could touch the floor with the flat of their hands) I am not very flexible at all so my score would be a zero.
The cardiologist has decided that a non-interventionist approach is best for David. Yay. I am all for non intervention. We go back to see the cardiologist in late January 2010. The irregularities with Dave’s heart mean that he will have to take extra care of himself and always be aware of the “heart healthy options” which is a big call for a fifteen year old boy who, like his peers thinks that he is ten foot tall and bullet proof.
My mouth is all healed up as is my self esteem. I can wear my teeth all day now without any major discomfort. I have plonked my teeth into the same category that shoes and bras belong, annoyances that must be worn outside the home for the sake of vanity. The first thing I do when I walk in the door when I get home is kick off my shoes, take off my bra and rip out my falsies. aaah.
I have been in touch with the trustees of a local nature reserve and they were quite excited about my idea of a sculpture trail. I was so nervous before I rang them,that I had to wander around the house psyching myself up to make the call. All the angst was for nothing and I was incredibly relieved and excited by the end of the phone call. I am meeting up with the trustees early next February on site. All I need to do is submit a written proposal to the committee and once that is approved I can begin working towards a major interactive exhibition in a lovely bush setting in February 2011. YAY.
I am also excited about our upcoming exhibition Perspectives of Fire and as soon as the invitations have been printed I will publish one here and then invite you all to the show.
I am working on some different bowls at the moment and Chris Jordan’s photos of the dead albatross chicks have really touched me. I am going to make a dead albatross bowl later on today and I will publish photos of it as a work in progress early next week.
Here are some bowls I made last week. These bowls are the sort of thing that I am thinking of making for the outdoor exhibition. If you mouse over the photos you can read the descriptions of what I have done.
I am off outside now to enjoy the sunshine.
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The bowls are beautiful! I think even the broken one will fire nicely and make a wonderful decorative piece in the garden.
I love the top pic of your mum. It’s so warm and inviting and I hope someday you can see its beauty again.
Thank you for the gluten free email. I failed miserably when I ate beef broth containing caramel color–not realizing what I’d done. Also, I had no idea herbal teas could contain gluten! I can tell it’s going to be a learning curve and that list is helping a lot. Thank you!
That’s life I suppose. Looking back, loss, pain healing… and things to look forward to as well.
I love your work. You deserve that upcoming exhibition!
What I see in that top pic is a woman who looks so proud of that child and filled with love. We should all be so lucky eh? *hugs*
I am LOVING the bowls, they are amazing!! And I just wanted to say that also find my daughter doing things that my mother was very good at, which is very interesting since they never met. I think it is her way of staying in my life. Hugs!
I love the photo of your mum with Amy.
I am pleased that the sculpture trail is a “go”! That will be an excellent challenge for you.
Lucky you for the blue skies. Enjoy. We’re having grey skies and rain, much needed though.
Sunshine and blue skies … that’s great! Uplifts the spirit!!
Love your screensaver! Whenever you talk of your Mum always makes me think of mine who is ‘going down’. They moved her to Frail Care 2 weeks ago. Have not been sure whether to go now to see her, or wait for Dec when my eldest brother visits from England (he hasn’t seen our mum for 4 years!) Flights are not cheap so can’t keep popping down to the Cape as often as I would like. Going to take a chance and go down in Dec – hope I’m not too late.
You may not have had your Mum for long enough but my goodness every day of that life is imprinted on you all. It will get easier, not better, but a fond, wistful smile at remembered times will replace the tears you shed so quickly still.
Hopefully David’s early diagnosis will give him a better outcome in the long run. Fingers crossed for the sense to go easy on his choices in the future.
The bowls are simply amazing. What a gift you have. Good luck with the Sculpture Walk and the exhibition, not that you need luck, your talent will carry you through.
We have had some blue skies recently too. What a relief 🙂
Hey, I do the same thing! Off with the bra and shoes, out with the false tooth, (I only have one, but it’s a front one so have to wear it when out), on with the comfy t-shirt and fluffy socks. I’d rather be barefoot but then I can feel the crumbs on the floor and who can waste time sweeping when my bloggy friends are calling to me? Blue skies here too, but the temperature is climbing a little too high for me already. I don’t handle the heat well and I’m dreading summer.
The work is lovely, the pictures of Mum are heartening and you are glorious – I can just picture you coming home and …. nevermind. Anyway, congratulations on the trail thing – I look forward to seeing photos when it happens.
I’m glad the sun is shining on you. You deserve it.
Good luck with the exhibition – I wish I could come. I love the bowl with the leaves in, it will look fantastic in the garden.
beautiful photo and beautiful bowls!
I’m so excited for you and your exhibit!
Hope is a good thing, hold on to it. ((HUGS))
I have a photo of my grandmother which hides still a little behind a curtain – I can get it out now when I feel able and bathe in the twinkle from her beautiful blue eyes. She was my rock too. I think the photo is beautiful and understand so well how you are feeling.
The trail – oh my god I am excited for you, so goodness knows how you must feel – a New Year’s Project to look forward to indeed.
Hoping Veronica is well enough to be out with her beautiful horses soon.
Having looked at the linked photo’s which are so so upsetting. Your work is inspiring.
Hoping sunny days and blue skies continue – soak in the rays, you deserve each and every one.
This post is like a Sunday afternoon, nothing really going on, but it’s nice to just hang around.
You sound like that old joke of the gorgeous model who removes her false eye, false boobs, wooden leg, etc before hopping into bed on her wedding night 😉
The broken bowl …could you have one half up higher to fill and spill over into the second half placed lower down under it, like a stepped-type bird bath/water feature? To represent that while you’re broken hearted at your mum’s passing your pieces are still together because she made you a strong person (((hugs)))
Your bowls are lovely.I would use the broken ones for water and food for birds in the garden.
broken things can still be loved just because they are broken.
The layered one seems fragile and I love the way it has cracked.
My grandma was my rock and I moved to be near her during the last few years of her life. Together we removed plants from her garden and transferred them to mine, my grandma taught me about gardening, fruit and veg. Its now 10 years and I’m going to have to thin out some of grandma’s plants and colonise another part of the garden with them. I cannot yet give them away like I do with other garden plants that get too big or spread too much.
My studio is in the garden so everytime I look out the window, or wander around for insipration I come accross part of my grandma.
I hated the reminders at first but now its really nice to feel close to grandma again, remembering the times in my own garden and the times as a child in hers trying very hard to concentrate on weeds or planting seeds.
theres no right or wrong way to deal with loss you just have to find something that works for you, and one day acceptance will come.
It sounds like you have some really good projects to be working on good luck with them.
Love these bowls!
I now how you feel – it is almost 30 years since mum was killed and I still grieve. It goes on, but is softened by time to a sort of nostalgia, without the sharp immediacy – but it does take time.
I’m digging the site man. You have a lot of inspiring content on here. I myself have a site that brings inspiration and guidance to millions of visitors around the world. I was thinking about a link exchange to let our visitors know about both our sites. Let me know.
Jason
TheWISDOMWALL.com
Both sorry and glad to read about David. Glad that everyone knows what is going on, precautions to take, etc.
The bowls are just really something. They’re truly Aussie creations, very specific and connected with nature etc.
big hugs Kimme..
amen to bare feet and no bra’s 🙂
cant comment on the no teeth as i dont have false ones yet.. 😉
your work looks great..