It is some ungodly hour in the morning and I cant sleep. I am sitting out here trying to type quietly so that I don’t wake Jeff up. Shit! Shit! Shit! 25 weeks is way too early to have a baby.
I cant sit still and I want to open a new bag of clay and start work on a sculpture. Then I can pour all the worry and stress that is threatening to make my head explode into the clay.
There is a 50/50 chance that my daughter will go into early labour within the next week..Fuck.
It is too early to ring the hospital and find out how she went overnight. did she sleep well? I just want to stroke her forehead and whisper to her that everything will be ok and that magic kisses will fix all her hurts..
I am feeling like I am streched really really thinly at the moment. I need to walk barefoot in the garden and earth myself, I need to feel the moonlight in order to mend my soul.. But it is too cold and dark and what bloody use will I be to my daughter if I sprain my ankle?
I can just imagine the conversation..
V: How did you sprain your ankle?
M: umm I was in the garden at 3 am.
V: (uses her bossy daughter tone) What were you doing in the garden in the middle of the night..?
M: umm trying to take photographs of the moon.
V:Did they work?
M: No…
******************************************************************************************
It is now the afternoon and I have been in the garden in the daylight and I think it has helped a little bit.
I know that Veronica is nice and safe in the hospital and that is the best place for her at the moment.
I have updated Veronica’s blog for her and I have been touched by the kindness and concern shown to my daughter..
so far all is well…
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*dabs teary eyes*
Kim, I cannot imagine the worry you must be feeling. Your own mum. Your daughter. I wish I could wrap my arms around you and take that away. How un-fucking-fair that you cannot take this fear and worry away from your daughter. That’s what mommies are for, dammit!
I am SO SO praying that the little baby was just getting antsy and will now settle into his warm and cozy place for a few more months.
I am off to bed on Saturday night. I will send more prayers your way and hope that your day has no more negativity added to it!
Hyphen Mamas last blog post..Prayer Circle
(((hugs))) Try and put your head down for a nana nap when you can.
We’re all thinking of Vonnie and the young lad here.
Jaynes last blog post..Trivial History October 12
Praying that all will continue to be well
hugs
Bettinas last blog post..Simple Pleasures Sunday
Oh, what a year you are having. It isn’t fair! Just remember, you are only one person, you can’t be all things to all people 24/7. Nobody in your family would think less of you for taking a tiny bit of time out. I’m so sorry for your pain, confusion, fear, uncertainty. I wish I could take some of it away. Like everyone else, I’m praying and hoping that things will work out well for all concerned. Try and take care of yourself, ok? xo
Oh babe, I can only imagine how you are feeling. Your baby girl.
We are all thinking of you babe.
Hugs, Kim. I am thinking of you. You must feel so incredibly stressed, as a mother and a daughter and as a Grandmother too.
tiffs last blog post..Weekly Winners.
Kimme,
thinking of you and praying that the lil one decides to stay put just a wee bit longer.. 🙂
big hugs to you and veronica..
thinking of you..
Oh my goodness Kim, I’m so sorry to hear this news. I will be thinking of you all and keeping everything crossed for the best possible outcome. Lots of hugs and love from the UK, BG x x x
Bendy Girls last blog post..Bog Off! Exhibit 5
As always, all the best
Xbox4NappyRashs last blog post..No brakes
Oh Kim, I can only imagine how worried you must be. We’re all sending our sticky-thoughts to the little guy. Thinking of you all. xxx
Marylins last blog post..Happy 1st Birthday Max!
Hi Veronica’s mom,
I’ve been reading her site, and am glad to have found yours. Thanks for updating us all… I know this is an eclectic community of people who only know each other through the blog world, but hopefully it will feel good to know that I’m sending you healthy grounding energy/vibes/prayer (whatever you want to call it) also.
You’re a special woman– and if it wasn’t becoming winter this weekend here in Colorado, USA, I’d be out in the garden saying a little spell for you both, too.
So you’ll have to accept my sweater-wrapped, knee-socked, in the warm carpeted living room energy instead. 🙂 Much love.
We are praying – for Vonnie, for the baby, for you and for your Mum. From the heart.
lceels last blog post..The Kid is Home
Oh, I can’t tell you how I’ve been thinking of all you guys. :[ Thank you for keeping everyone posted. I really do appreciate the updates.
Mrs. Cs last blog post..The Sarah Palin Debate Flow Chart
Everyone’s going to be okay, I just know it. You go right ahead and sprain your ankle if you have to. 🙂
Mr Ladys last blog post..Rate the Hate the I Don’t Even Have FLOUR Yet Edition
THINKING BIG HUGE positive thoughts . . . just droppin’ by to check on Veronica’s mom . . . I’m thinking positive thoughts. Big huge, fat, hairy positive thoughts (they are the best, btw–at least the hairy ones).
LaskiGals last blog post..On Fear
I was just at Veronica’s blog and saw that she is home from the hospital.
I am sorry you are going through all this, and very glad that everything seems to be okay for now.
I am thinking of you guys all the time.
julies last blog post..Moving in.