In November there is an exhibition for Art, Craft and Design students at the Long Gallery in Salamanca Place. Before Mum was diagnosed with lung cancer I was excited about this exhibition and had some vague notions of making some quiet pieces,some simple forms that just were themselves and arranging them as a still life.
Now I am not so sure. My foundations have been rocked and I feel like I am slipping away from myself.
It has been a few years since I have flown out of Tasmania and because I live surrounded by so much natural beauty I tend to forget how ugly cities are.
When I flew into Melbourne with Mum, as we approached the city I noticed that nearly everything was square. Square fields, Square dams, Square houses on Square blocks of land. I dont particularly care much for squares.
The red tiled roofs of the houses reminded me of a bad rash on the face of a beautiful woman.
I have thought of starting a new blog. A new blog where I can just blurt out the shit that is inside my head. But I really cant be bothered and I just dont have the time. Mum reads this blog so how can I write about how much her cancer is upsetting me, without upsetting Mum as well? If I cant write about what is in my head what is the point of writing at all.
It is not really the cancer that upsets me because I reckon that we can beat that. It is the thought of life without my Mother that has rattled me. I really feel like I am swiiming through treacle and I am so pleased that I have finished drinking.
I have always been upset by the sight of dead wildlife on the side of the road, not overly upset at the fact that they were dead but more upset by the waste, a waste of their life as well as a waste of food. Now I find that I want to photograph the roadkill and I want to document the callousness of a society that leaves an animal lying dead in the middle of the road.
I think that for the exhibition I will cast some shells and cover them in graffiti and that will be my simple statement about what we do to beauty.